So, yeah, I lost my focus again… I guess I tried to push it a bit too hard, because I’ve been caught up in a vortex of self-doubt and –deprecation for over a week now.
One of the greatest obstacles I face is a serious case of low self-esteem. This is an issue that has plagued me since childhood, and is most likely the biggest component of my depressive disorder. My failure to keep up with the rigorous program I had undertaken sent me into a downward spiral that was tough to get out of.
I now recognize that this has to be my first consideration in my quest for a healthy life – my emotional fitness has to come first, else there is no hope of ever achieving physical fitness (my mental fitness is beyond help, but that’s another story… )
Anyway, another fitblogger I follow, Fit and Free Emily (http://www.fitandfreeemily.com/), tweeted today that she is starting over on her 100 Day Chip Quest (details here…), and I replied that I would join her. So, here goes…
My first goal is to let go of guilt over food. If I should happen to slip up, either deliberately or accidentally, I will not condemn myself, as this tends to send my eating out of control. Life is not gonna stop if I have an extra bit of chocolate, right? Why should I let it make me lose sight of what I want to do?
I have started tracking my food again, and will continue to do so… Not going to worry if I go over my limit, though… They’re just guidelines anyway, right?
As an adjunct, I’m going to try to be more active every day, and not condemn myself for skipping a workout… I’m also not going to let the scale rule me – I’ll look at the numbers, but do my best not to let them bother me!
So ends Day 1 of my quest…